I am in a state of shock at myself. I have a blog! Those of you who really know me must be shocked too. The first time I ever heard the word, I thought it was a new clog dance; certainly not a high-tech term having to do with computers. But here I am, the person who has as little as possible to do with computers and no interest in improving upon myself in this area, with a blog.
It was the Lord who did it. A few days ago He said, "Bonnie, I want you to start a blog". I said, "Lord, you've got to be kidding. It's just not me God, I keep all my time compartmentalized. If I do this, I will get lost in the sea of unending entries that zap all the time I spend serving you, Lord. I'll say too many personal things. I'll use words wrong. I'll talk too much about myself. I'll be too gushy. It won't be as exciting as so-in-so's and no one will read it. I'll . . . . . . "The Lord broke in, "Bonnie, I want you to start a blog". I sensed some excitement brewing. Like when, as a child, my dad suddenly announced, "everyone pack up we're spending the weekend at the houseboat on the lake" or the time Mark informed me, with a twinkle in his eye, he was taking me to Maine.
I made the mistake of casually whispering it to Cassie, the blog queen. Big mistake!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She promptly sat me down by the computer and set the whole darn thing up for me. When it came to naming it she even encouraged me to stop and pray about it. We prayed together. I thought she would come up with something clever, since she always comes through in this area. Low and behold a name popped into my head, totally original (the person who always copies everyone else's ideas). You again, God!!!!
So, here I am taken by surprise. I am both giddy at the possibilities of what God may do through such a blog and scared to death of my inadequacies. I'm not even sure why I'm doing this. I have found it to be true, Aslan is not a tame lion. I long for security, but He beckons to the unknown.
"So, okay, Lord, I give up. Go ahead, have your blog, but don't expect me to know what to do with it". Somehow, I sense that was the attitude He was waiting for.
